I like the Talking Heads. My favorite song, the one that reminds me of Taed, is a Talking Heads song — not this one, but one nonetheless. However, as I reflect on my life, I have to wonder, “How did I get here?”
You see, 25 years ago I NEVER would have imagined the life that I have. You see, I wasn’t going anywhere when I was 20. I was going to finish college, go to grad school to become a librarian, return home to Des Moines, and live out life. I was certain I was never getting married or having children.
Then, that didn’t happen. By 25, I had returned home to Des Moines to work at the same insurance company my mom worked at. I lived at home. I had no path, no goals, and no idea what I was going to do.
Then, in October 1993, Taed came to visit. Needless to say, my life changed that night. For the better. Always for the better.
Even though I haven’t always been ready to move into the land of maturity and adulthood, Taed has managed to get me there. I always think it’s my idea. It’s not.
I moved in with Taed in July 1994. That’s 18 years ago. During that time I’ve become a teacher, a mother and a wife. I’ve made friends, found community, and managed to live a life that’s pretty stable and happy. I’ve managed (so far) not to fuck it up by being… well, me. I can honestly say that there is nothing good in my life that isn’t connected in some small way to Taed.
Today is his 45th birthday. According to my stats, we’ve been together 19 years. That’s a long time, yet it feels like nothing more than a day or a week. Like water, the days flowed by. And time isn’t holding us, time isn’t after us. Once in a lifetime, I got lucky and met the love of my life.
And I couldn’t be happier.