Despite exploring the idea that I MAY be ADHD (which my husband thinks is insane), I have to say I do a great job at not sucker punching every moronic fuckwit who throws out this term in reference to “protecting her baby”. I WANT to do it, but I don’t. That has to count for something, right?
Look, in nature mother bears RARELY interfere with what their children are doing. They ONLY go Mama BEAR IF and WHEN there is a REAL THREAT. Your child being told to sit down? Not a threat. Your child being called as nasty name? Annoying, yes — not a threat. Some kid threatening to stab your child in the stomach with a knife? Maybe — but hold out to see. Some people are just impulsive and stupid. A REALLY big kid, then yes. Please get involved. This MAY be a threat.
This term seems to be thrown around whenever we get angry regarding how our child or children have been treated. There seems to be this societal expectation that mothers will (and should) do ANYTHING to protect, shield, and aid their children. Worse is the idea that children don’t lie, manipulate, or even bend the truth to make themselves look better. It’s that idea that: NO MATTER WHAT, I SUPPORT MY CHILD!!!
(You should see my face at this. Sighing and contortions are NOT enough.)
Look, it’s your job (and mine) to raise responsible and respectful people. This cannot be done if a child is not made to own up to his or her part of a problem. Sometimes, you really have to let your child get stung (ala baby bear in the bee hive) to learn about life. That’s your job. You only get involved for the BIG things.
While I’m loathe to say this (because normally I hate the expression), maybe it’s time for your mama bears to choose your battles carefully. Really. There’s a lot to be said for letting some things go.
Besides, experience is an AMAZING teacher.