This week seemed to be one in which I did one stupid thing after another. By Thursday afternoon, I should have just handed my credential back. SIGH. Disclosure would just add to the ignorance, give fuel to the fire, and possibly harm more than the innocent.
It’s strange because everyone thinks they can teach. After all, they’ve been taught and most have children. However, keeping students engaged is really hard and generally runs contrary to most lesson plans. It’s a rare kid whose brain jumps for joy at the idea of expanding his/her schema with parts of speech. Oooh, direct and indirect objects you say, tell me more. NOT!
Because of the constant push to satisfy the learners with some form of new brain candy as well as society by teaching what they feel is most important, plus parents who can’t decide if they want you to push their kids or if they’re just not ready, you end up in this really weird mental place. I had that this week. This job allows for tons of what you don’t do right and it’s actively pointed out. Heck, if no one tells me, I tell myself. I know when I’ve screwed up. And it ain’t pretty.
My job now is to regroup, pull my head out, and learn from my past mistakes. Barring that, look at my lessons again, find some challenge in them, allow for choice of what is done, and maybe include some more collaboration.
Or maybe I should curl up under the covers and just cry.